Tag Archives: Redbubble

“Oh! Fuck the fuchsia it’s Friday!”

13. The Mall – Richie Tankersley Cusick

Trish is working in the mall at Muffin Mania, it’s very Fast Times as she’s flirting across the food court (you can call it “The Eatery” all you want, we all know what it really is) with Storm at Pizza Park. Storm Reynolds isn’t who he says he is. He’s not a porn star as his name would imply, but he’s not who he seems and for some reason he continually clamps Trish’s arms and steers her places. Very controlling behavior-preview, Storm. He also drives too fast.

Trish has two friends, which keeps the focus on a few characters – her, Nita her shoppin’ friend that works in a clothing store, and Nita’s twin Imogene who works in the bookstore and wears…Glasses!…clearly she will never die. She also has a total bitch for a boss, Bethany, who sucks at communication and controlling the bustling atmosphere of Muffin Mania.

The other male characters are both weird and/or quirky. Wyatt, who speaks in riddles and wears a jean jacket with the sleeves cut off, totally sparks Imogene’s interest and therefore Nita’s, so she goes all 80s movie villain girl and tries to get his attention. He actually reminds me a little bit of the only person named Wyatt I know, except for the jean jacket thing.

The real villain of the piece goes a little bit more 70s giallo in his approach to stalking teenage girls – I couldn’t help but picture him with black gloves at all times. He hides in the mall and wears a series of disguises to keep his eyes on Trish at all times. His introduction is asking her for a honey muffin, later telling her boss he hit her car and she needs to come look at it, then when she gets outside and finds nothing happened to her car he calls on the payphone next to it and when Trish picks up he tells her the honey muffin tasted like her – Ew. – and ratchets up the creepery, staring, and random disguises from there. Ratchets up to kidnapping and ice pick murder, even.

If Trish would’ve just stayed in Kyle Kinane’s joke and never left that birthday party at Benihana, none of this would’ve happened. She would’ve had a choo-choo train made of onions instead.

Sure that hairy-armed guy in the gloves seems to be just nicely walking his fingers around, Ozma, but don’t take him up on his offer to pay your ballet school tuition.

Mixtape:

1. “Silently Stalking” – All of Them Witches
2. “Shadowman” – Devil Electric
3. “You Are the One” – A Place to Bury Strangers
4. “Don’t Let It In” – Wolfmen of Mars
5. “Bounce House Demons” – Chelsea Wolfe
6. “X” – Brass Hearse
7. “The Fear” – Pulp
8. “Venus in Furs” – Electric Wizard
9. “In Death (I’ll Love You More)” – Brass Hearse
10. “When I Was Bleedin'” – Dax Riggs
11. “If the Coffin’s Rockin’, Don’t Come Knockin'” – Terrortron
12. “Jam It in the Hole” – Electric Six
13. “Unflattering Lights” – Wolfmen of Mars
14. “Ur Djupet (Out of the Depths)” – Finntroll
15. “1985” – Kvelertak

Art Intrusion #485 – I have a Threadless store now!! It’s in progress, but it exists! The images are relatively large!
Threadless

Art Intrusion #486 – The newest item on both my New Threadless store and my Forever Redbubble store where you can totally buy stickers (!) is a Bi Pride flag I designed for a friend of mine who needed a Pride flag to reflect her love of red (and I, as a printmaker, recognized that process red aka magenta is actually already part of the bi flag so I whipped this idea up and printed it post haste because I love printing in process red and doing special images for my friends). It turned out pretty cute and I totally made her a tea towel so she can have this little binicorn in her kitchen reminding her what month it is now and to always be proud. Then I printed a more-magenta version to share with anyone who wants one to add to their own lovely flag collection. Happy Pride!

Bi Pride - RachelESmith

The Binicorn, waving proudly in the breeze.

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Adventures by the pool of sadness

Art break!

I’ve been painting again, because I’m participating in the GeekCraft Expo in Madison on March 3-4, it’s at the Masonic Center and it’s free to get in. Free to get in! That’s unlike any of the other shows I’ve done…anyway, another show means new paintings had to be done and this year I’ve been expanding my selection of guinea pigs on TV with:

Look at these boys on their bikes. They are ready for an adventure in the upside-down. They’re even wearing jackets. Sensible.

 

My adventurous little trio of boars – Ozymandias, Danger Crumples, and Horace – got out of the graveyard and into the guinea pig version of Hawkins.

And then there’s Pere-Barb:

Sitting by the pool of sadness, just like every other girl who was super cool in high school. Eat your heart out, actual cool kids.

Peregrine channels her inner lovable loser feelings to be Barb just before everything went tits up for her. Poor Barb. Poor everyone who understood how she felt sitting by that pool, alone, sent away from her best friend who had a shot at being cool… I certainly can’t relate. *cough*

I will have postcards of both of these paintings and the actual paintings on display and technically priced at the GeekCraft Expo, which is on March 3-4 in Madison at the Masonic Center. I will also have more paintings and more postcards and posters and prints I made with my human hands (which will also be visible) at the show. I’m not bringing Peregrine, but, that’s because her true beauty is hard to witness in person. It’s very distracting. Horace too, he’s like, really cute in person.

Anyway, sorry about that bragging, but everyone can enjoy images of Pere and Horace (and Ozy and Danger Crumples and more!) in person at the show OR, if you can’t make it to Madison, I have made them available on stuff and things via my Redbubble page:

Pere-Barb

Danger Things

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“Won’t you take a ride…ride…ride…On heavy metal”

Today only! Redbubble has a 20% off sale (and express shipping gets things to you by Xmas) if you use the code: GIFTNOW

And, may I add, I have added two new parody paintings to my portfolio that are available on things and stuff:

 

And

 

I saw somewhere that Porgs are based on puffins and I must call shenanigans. They look just like Pere. And she’s not a puffin. So I showed them who is boss in this parody painting, heavy metal-style.

 

Again, I have called shenanigans.

 

Finny is a pretty emo pig, he’s got a lot of emotions, and he could turn to villainy at any time.

 

See? Villain potential vs. my little valkyrie

 

I have many of my other paintings available on things and stuff too. You can have the weirdest home imaginable (next to mine, that is). My portfolio page, it’s FULL of piggy goodness.

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CBS Studios can’t tell a guinea pig parody from an actual copyright violation.

Today is my birthday. It is the second-most held birthday in the world thanks to New Year’s Eve… Anyway, today I woke up to a notice that Redbubble, the site where I sell the non-handmade versions of my work, took down the following painting:

Peregrine’s log saw something that night. It saw a corporation being a dick to a poor person about their guinea pig parody painting.

 

Because CBS Studios said it violates their rights. Fuck you, CBS. My nostalgic, guinea pig-centric television parody does not violate CBS Studio’s rights. This image has never existed before I painted it, it’s not accurately representing anything from the Twin Peaks universe- note that the inaccurate logo is a pun: “Peegs” is not “Peaks” and it is not accurately painted because I’m stuck with my human hands and I can’t perfectly match colors, Peregrine is not Margaret Lanterman and as far as I have ever seen, the Log Lady has never been in the Red Room – nerd detail, guys. My original concept utilizing the concept of parody and guinea pigs to put out something very cute featuring my little girl.

Parody has always been protected.

No one will ever confuse my work for any actual Twin Peaks merchandise.

And frankly, I don’t really sell all that much of anything I do, because it relies upon people who like guinea pigs to find it. Twin Peaks never involved guinea pigs. My Twin Peaks parody only has the possibility of profit if people who like guinea pigs find it. I’ve never sold a single one of my parodies in person to anyone who didn’t expressly become interested because of guinea pigs. The thing I’m parodying has always been the secondary concern. Always.

One last consideration – guinea pigs are not cats, the behemoth of the animal parody-trade.

Parody is protected.

Don’t go after artists who aren’t in your way.

I filed a counter-notice. I will update if I get my painting reinstated as it should be, I’ll maybe update if “screw you, poor artist person” stays the status quo.

 

Fuck you, CBS Studios. (Tulpa-Diane doesn’t even belong to you, CBS Studios, I bet you’re mad that I just parodied her phrasing and you can’t tell me to take it down.) Ozma doesn’t want you to break my heart on my birthday anymore, even if Funko Bob would probably support that.

 

This week I also found another site where people are stealing the first book of my Squirrelpocalypse Trilogy and now this, on my birthday, well… I’ve never been happier. I don’t know why it’s important to prevent someone whose work barely anyone is even interested in from making any money off it, further enforcing that they will never get to be who they are full time, but that is what I am learning this month.

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It is happening again. (YAY!/I hope it’s good.)

We are taking a break from our regularly scheduled programming to bring you a message about painting and excitement for the Twin Peaks new season premiering this Sunday and of course, guinea pigs.

This year I’ve been working on some more paintings that inject my sweet little guineas into glorious television shows. I started this series last year with my Danger Dixon parody, Danger Who number 10 and Danger Who number 11 , iPiggie , and now I give you the ladypigs of Twin Peegs.

But first, because Laura always comes first, I did a little photoshoot of Ozma acting as Laura being menaced by BOB in Fire Walk With Me:

I’m sure you can all tell this is an exact and painstaking recreation. I didn’t have to convince Ozma to walk in that direction and be menaced several times.

Funko Bob is super intimidating.

There we go. Fully menaced Ozma-Laura, running away…

In the actual paintings I decided to cast Merricat as Audrey Horne (my favorite Twin Peaks high schooler):


Ozma as Shelly Johnson:

Here’s Ozma not even really looking at herself as Shelly.

And Miss Peregrine herself as the Log Lady (my favorite Twin Peaks adult lady. I have a log pillow and vaguely debated trying to get my mom to buy me a real log when visiting the Twin Peaks section of a gift shop in Snoqualmie Falls as a teenager):

Peregrine’s log saw something that night.

Peregrine also got some time with a small toy version of her character:

In the White Lodge – which is clearly not my bedroom -, they allow attempted hair cuts the same way I get them – guinea pig teeth.

Peregrine starts to take this whole thing a little more seriously.

Each of the full paintings is available on a variety of objects/in several fashions (posters, coffee mugs you can fill with fish coffee or damn fine coffee, either way, phone cases, my favorite the throw pillow, etc.) on my Redbubble page.

Guinea pigs love art work. And posing for pictures. And pie. And Special Agent Dale Cooper most of all, but also Albert.

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There’s a new, rather dramatic mouse corpse in my basement.

While attempting to finish the piggy laundry today, I noticed a dead mouse in the basement. But it’s not just dead, it’s dramatically dead… upside-down, arms splayed, head thrown back, probably did a soliloquy on the way out dead. And because it’s being so attention grabbing, I was reminded that I have a store that I could be promoting more dramatically because tomorrow (October 17th) things are going to be 20% off. You may use this code: twentyoff-guineapigsbooks

A store full of guinea pig stuff!

Some of my items go nicely with The Walking Dead…which premieres next week, watch while wearing a jaunty scarf from the end of the apparel section.

Many items are Halloween appropriate, especially the Pigoween stuff.

Finny would like you to know that without the support of viewers like you, he might not make it into more than the two paintings (iPiggie and The Finny Awakens) you can currently get on throw pillows.

Finny would like you to know that without the support of viewers like you, he might not make it into more than the two paintings ( iPiggie and The Finny Awakens ) you can currently get on throw pillows.

 

 

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It’s no Guinea Pigs and Books, the flamethrower, but I think it’s close enough for now.

So, I have artwork available for sale now, via my Redbubble profile. I am also currently selling my work at Wizard World Chicago , but, what I’m selling in Chicago I literally painted or printed with my own human hands (except the postcards and posters, I had those made) and there’s only one shirt. It glows in the dark. Redbubble has no tea towels, but it does have several other items I find highly amusing:

This is the throw pillow I've always wanted. Although I would never station it on one lonely chair like this.

This is the throw pillow I’ve always wanted of my little Merricat. Although I would never station it on one lonely chair like this.

 

Not to be outdone in any fashion, Peregrine is also on a throw pillow on a lonely, unfortunately padded chair.

Not to be outdone in any fashion, Peregrine is also on a throw pillow on a lonely, unfortunately padded chair.

Metal prints! This painting went to a good home with the other two Danger Crumples takes over for Christopher Pike paintings, so, the most brutal type of print is maybe the easiest way to get your own. Unless you want it on a throw pillow, or a shirt, or a mug, lots of things really.

Metal print! This painting went to a good home with the other two Danger Crumples takes over for Christopher Pike paintings, so, the most brutal type of print is maybe the easiest way to get your own. Unless you want it on a throw pillow, or a shirt, or a mug, lots of things really.

Stationary too! Pammy, on her mammoth, potentially on your greeting cards.

Stationery too! Pammy, on her mammoth, potentially on your greeting cards.

Okay, back to Merricat. The only piece of apparel I print on when I'm hand silkscreening is the baseball tee. Baseball tees are available on Redbubble, but not in the most obvious way. One must click literally any of the tees first.

Okay, back to Merricat. The only piece of apparel I print on when I’m hand silkscreening is the baseball shirt. Baseball shirts are available on Redbubble, but not in the most obvious way. One must click literally any of the t-shirts first.

Then, use the pull down menu to select the baseball tee. I have officially sanctioned the colors I'll allow for all the shirts, so, if you must have a tee other than a baseball shirt with any of my images on it, fine, but no orange. It doesn't go.

Then, use the pull down menu to select the “Baseball 3/4 Sleeve.” I have officially sanctioned the colors I’ll allow for all the shirts, so, if you must have a t-shirt other than a baseball shirt with any of my images on it, fine, but no orange. It doesn’t go.

This is the gold version of the Danger Crumples with a flashlight image, the one that got me back into printmaking. It would be adorable on a duvet cover.

This is the gold version of the Danger Crumples with a flashlight image, the one that got me back into printmaking. It would be adorable on a duvet cover.

Sometimes, when you move your images around for optimum placement, you end up designing a phone skin with a captive Ozma on it.

Sometimes, when you move your images around for optimum placement, you end up designing a phone case with a captive Ozma on it.

Horace can use an old school computer on your much newer, less possessed computer.

Horace can use an old school computer on your much newer, less possessed computer.

The official Pigs in a Graveyard hardcover journal.

The official Pigs in a Graveyard hardcover journal.

Many of my images are available on scarves, which is pretty damn cool. And then there's the miniskirt. Yes, you can have zombie leper pirates and their undead guinea pig captain Danger Crumples on a miniskirt. Also available as a miniskirt, antichrist Finny.

Many of my images are available on scarves, which is pretty damn cool. And then there’s the miniskirt. Yes, you can have zombie leper pirates and their undead guinea pig captain Danger Crumples on a miniskirt. Also available as a miniskirt, antichrist Finny.

Lastly, I have also painstakingly made "Artist Notes" for each image I uploaded, read them at your own peril, but remember to click back to the products afterwards, lest the point get confusing.

Lastly, I have also painstakingly made “Artist Notes” for each image I uploaded, read them at your own peril, but remember to click back to the products afterwards, lest the point get confusing.

More pillows (and some other random people’s stuff thrown in, sorry random people, you’re getting overtaken by my herd:

Whee!

Whee! Also, there’s that golden Danger Crumples duvet cover in the second row, next to Pammy on a Mammoth. I don’t think it’s too hard to tell which of these are my work and which two are not.

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I’ve finished 47 paintings, 8 silkscreens, put out 1 e-book, and carved out my own little corner of an online store so far this year. Last year I did a little less. A little.

Seventeen of the eighteen "blind paintings" I finished. All of these will be available for an adorably low price at Wizard World Chicago, but they will also be wrapped up so no one knows which painting they're getting. Drawing and painting eight animal and bird skulls in one weekend is not something I advise anyone to do, regardless of how much they used to like painting skulls.

Seventeen of the eighteen “blind paintings” I finished. All of these will be available for an adorably low price at Wizard World Chicago, but they will also be wrapped up so no one knows which painting they’re getting. Drawing and painting eight animal and bird skulls in one weekend is not something I advise anyone to do, regardless of how much they used to like painting skulls.

 

All the printing for Chicago! I do think my Army of Dangers tea towel is my favorite of the five images I've printed on tea towels this year.

All the printing for Chicago! I do think my Army of Dangers tea towel is my favorite of the five images I’ve printed on tea towels this year.

 

Postcard swag.

Postcard swag. After the reception my images received at Wizard World Madison, I wanted to make it more possible to take home my aesthetic and I’m pretty fond of postcards.

Some of the images on these are no longer available in any handmade format… all three Danger Crumples takes over for Christopher Pike paintings went to a good home. And the one of Danger with the white starburst behind him was solely a commission. But! Fear not, anyone who picked up my cute little Merricat with the Zebras record, turned it over looking for a price, and then had to ask me only to recoil in slight shock (I like that one too), I had both postcards made AND posters. The poster is bigger than the painting, but still looks sassy thanks to my friend Rebecca’s skills.  Enjoy McWikken, Army of Dangers, Danger Dixon (not pictured, previously posted), and both Danger Who paintings (“) are also now available in full color posters – I didn’t get very many made, and of course, they are only purchasable in person from my booth at Wizard World Chicago August 18-19-20-21.

AND, to keep going yet longer, I also made several of my images available to be purchased on a variety of things via Redbubble . A link to my profile page is at the bottom of my blog, also on my About page, and I’ll have a more thorough post coming about my store in a few days so I can showcase all the products I think are particularly amusing. Here is a teaser photo –

The real reason I chose to put stuff up for sale besides being asked quite few times if I sold online (I sell handmade things in person, non-handmade online), I can now get Merricat on a throw pillow. And Horace. And Pere. And I can get a guinea pig skull duvet cover. It's ridiculous.

The real reason I chose to put stuff up for sale on Redbubble besides being asked quite a few times if I sold online (I sell handmade things in person, non-handmade online), I can now get Merricat on a throw pillow. And Horace. And Pere. All the throw pillows! And I can get a guinea pig skull duvet cover, or Finny as the antichrist on a duvet cover, or the golden Danger Crumples (not pictured). It’s ridiculous. I could have the weirdest couch decor ever. So could you, gentle reader. So could you.

 

47 Paintings, 8 Silkscreens, 1 Link – Wizard World Chicago profile

For those who cannot come to Chicago and wish to work on the amount of guinea pigs visually available in their home – my Redbubble profile

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