Dollangers ho!

38. Flowers in the Attic – V.C. Andrews

So, this is that incest book. So sensational. So, very, sensational. But the plodding. Oh sweet zombie Jesus the plodding. I wanted to read this because I recall watching the film version of this on HBO one morning before walking to daycare. I probably shouldn’t have been watching it, but the giant green lawn with the huge house at the end of it seemed enticing and then Grandmother was so scary. The thing is, in the movie they could montage quickly through time. In the book she sort of attempts to do that but ends up creating the reading experience of being trapped in quicksand. I like my sentences to be more functional than flowery. Sometimes it seems like an author thinks that if they throw enough adjectives at you the images will come when it’s really better to spare the adjectives, lest you become mired in the plodding.

Since V.C. Andrews died before the film version of Flowers in the Attic was allowed to wreak havoc on young minds (apparently she has a cameo as a maid in the movie but died before it was released), her estate hired Andrew Neiderman to write the rest of the umpteen million books released with her name on them. Now that’s a brand. Neiderman has several of his own horror novels which I have not read yet because they aren’t available at my library (I have always thought of libraries as havens for really random books and yet this time mine let me down). He is responsible for the novel Pin that spawned the film of the same name with the uber-creepy mannequin.

Wake me up when they cut her hair and break the music box - Murderface

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